Weekly Rassling Rundown 02 – 04 Apr

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Welcome to this week’s Weekly Rassling Rundown. This week is up earlier than usual due to it being WrestleMania weekend! Let’s dive into this week’s WWE Raw, SmackDown, and NXT shows!

Raw Logo
Welcome everyone, to Monday Night RAW!
  • We kick off the final Raw before WrestleMania with… a social media Q&A.
  • First Ronda Rousey stole Roddy Piper’s nickname, now she’s stolen both Mickie James’ hair and Bayley’s kid-hugging gimmick.
  • You’ve been in the WWE for about a month now Ronda. It’s time to stop acting surprised whenever you hear people mildly chant your name.
  • Ronda doesn’t know how Q&A works. She wants an answer to her question that she asked in the middle of Triple H asking his question to Kurt Angle.
  • “We all know how you handle losses,” Stephanie McMahon said to Ronda. BURN!!!
  • I get Ronda’s meant to be a strong female athlete, but it looks unbelievable when Triple H easily allows her to overpower him repeatedly.
  • Not sure what move Stephanie used to put Ronda carefully through the table. Could someone please judo-splain it to me?
  • Also, that was the worst Q&A segment I’ve ever seen in my life.
  • The Fabulous Moolah Memorial WrestleMania Women’s Battle Royal trophy looks bad.
  • It’ll be good to final see cry-baby Bayley wrestle mean Sasha Banks. Hopefully we get another classic from them that mirrors the matches they had in NXT.
  • Congrats to Miz and Maryse on the birth of their daughter, Monroe Sky.
  • Here’s a drinking game for everyone – take a shot when the “WrestleMania is free for new WWE Network subscribers” crawler appears.
  • Miz is happy to be pooped and peed on by someone he loves.
  • Great match between Seth Rollins & Finn Balor. The crowd was into it from start to finish. I really can’t wait to see them clash at WrestleMania with Miz in the middle of it.
  • After allowing Brock Lesnar to beat the hell out of Roman Reigns two weeks in a row, NOW Kurt Angle is concerned about protecting Raw’s WrestleMania main event!
  • Braun Strowman dressing up as his twin brother “Brains” Strowman was… Brilliant.
  • Matt Hardy now gets to bury Goldust! Wonderful!
  • Mickie James is making fun of Nia Jax’s weight, even though SHE was the target of bullying in a similar storyline many years ago. Shame on you, Piggie James. Shame on you!
  • Why does John Cena think there’s no more time left for Undertaker to respond? Did Cena forget he has free-agency privileges to abuse? He could easily call him out over on SmackDown.
  • Cena says he’ll be going to WrestleMania as a fan. I think it’s too late for him to get a good ticket.
  • Wait, Cena doesn’t want in on any of the other WrestleMania matches because he doesn’t want to take the spot away from a full-time wrestler? Are you F#$%ing kidding me?! From January he’s been asserting himself into matches by burying full-time wrestlers and taking THEIR spots! This whole angle has been stupid from start to finish and I can’t wait for it to God damn finally end after WrestleMania.
  • Cena tries once more to get the crowd to summon Undertaker. It takes him three attempts to finally get them to chant “Undertaker” instead of them just cheering and clapping.
  • “There’s your big break,” Braun said to Curt Hawkins after throwing him through a wall. 80’s action star – this is Braun’s gimmick now.
  • What did Asuka do to be teamed up with Dana Brooke?
  • Dana seems to be happy teaming with Asuka despite being choked out several times by her. The Empress of Amnesia’s streak continues.
  • If Asuka loses the tag team match her undefeated streak is over? Fair enough if she takes the pin, but not if she doesn’t take the pin. She’s lost a few matches in NXT because her partner got pinned, but her streak doesn’t break because of that. Hell, she even got eliminated in a battle royal in NXT and that didn’t break the streak either!
  • Good to see the Raw Tag Team Division was finally put to good use by standing in the middle of the ramp to stop Roman from getting to Brock.
  • Thanks to Paul Heyman, we now have the ending of Brock vs. Roman spoiled for us.
  • Good closing segment between Roman and Brock. I can’t wait to see them collide in the ring at WrestleMania.
Smackdown Logo
Welcome to SmackDown – The Land of Opportunity!
  • Thank you, WWE, for acknowledging Shane McMahon’s diverticulitis wasn’t caused by Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn’s attack. Shane McMahon claims Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn gave him diverticulitis.
  • Shane also confirmed we’re in Nashville.
  • Raw’s drinking game continues SmackDown!
  • For the past six months or so, Daniel Bryan has been coming out protecting Owens and Zayn from Shane’s blind hatred towards them. Shane was making unfair decisions and screwing the two over repeatedly, so Daniel would step in and fix the situation. Daniel has been doing his job correctly making sure everything was fair and equal for everyone. It looked like Shane was headed towards a much-needed heel turn, or Daniel was going to turn heel by saying him, Owens, and Zayn were working together all along. This entire storyline was immediately undone when Daniel told Shane, “you were right from the beginning”, and they instantly buried the hatchet. Thank you, WWE, for ruining one of the best storylines you had going and for wasting the time everyone invested into this.
  • Also, wasn’t Shane on indefinite leave?
  • Daniel says the crowd wants to see him and Shane hug out their differences. I’m more inclined to say they wanted to see the two fight.
  • Charlotte Flair and Natalya Neidhart have a good match only to be interrupted by a failed Carmella cash in. SmackDown, the land of Déjà vu!
  • Asuka vs Charlotte, another WrestleMania match which sells itself. No hype or fancy promos needed.
  • I’m extremely disappointed Jeff Jarrett didn’t sing in a Nashville bar.
  • Please let Rusev win the US Championship at WrestleMania. At this point he’s the only good thing about this match.
  • Why did Bobby Roode interfere and save Randy Orton? This isn’t AJ Style vs. Shinsuke Nakamura. You don’t have to protect anyone. Unless it’s Rusev.
  • Even though Orton and Roode are having the intense stare down in the middle of the ring, the crowd’s still chanting Rusev Day.
  • If you’ve been playing the drinking you, you still need to take a shot for New Day plugging the WWE Network.
  • The Bludgeon Brothers save us from that sh*tty tag team promo by striking the camera with their hammers and summoning Baron Corbin.
  • Hey look, they gave us J.O.B Squad 2.0 vs J.O.B Squad 3.0!
  • Holy crap, I forgot Epico and/or Primo is employed by WWE!
  • Great promo from Owens and Zayn. I’ve been reading about how the two have been interrupting live events, so it was great to see it happen on the SmackDown before WrestleMania. Zayn’s heel microphone work is always fantastic and keeps getting better.
  • Shane talks about how much he can’t wait to get rid of Owens and Zayn, but what’s stopping them from going to Raw? Dumb move, Shane, especially when you have the draft coming up.
  • Nakamura psyches out Styles last week, so Styles psyches out Nakamura this week. That’s it. Nothing more needed. Can it be WrestleMania now, please?

 

NXT Logo
Meanwhile, at NXT…
  • Poor Bobby Fish. It sucks to see him get injured.
  • The Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic finals between Authors of Pain vs. Roderick Strong & Pete Dunne gets interrupted by Undisputed Era, so now we’ll get a Triple Threat Match where the winners get both the NXT Tag Team Championship and the trophy. If Undisputed Era win, that’s kinda not fair to the other two teams. On the other hand, we get to see Adam Cole wrestle twice.
  • That was a good hype video for the North American Championship match.
  • That was an even better video package for Ciampa/Gargano match!
  • Vanessa Borne’s theme doesn’t suit her at all. It was kind of sad (and funny) how the crowd looked on in anticipation like, “Oh wow, a new wrestler? I wonder who it’s gonna… Oh never mind.”
  • Lacey Evans says Nikki Cross can’t do a proper interview? I’d take Nikki’s rambling over Lacey’s boring promos any day.
  • Wait, William Regal gave Kyle O’Reilly the option to defend the NXT Tag Team Titles solo? That means Braun DOESN’T need a partner at WrestleMania!
  • Ember Moon talks about how Shayna Baszler walks around expecting everything to be handed to her, yet Ember’s the reason why Baszler was handed two NXT Women’s Championship opportunities!
  • Boo! Don’t end the show with a stare down between the six wrestlers involved in the North American Championship match! Let them brawl!

That’s all for this edition of WRR! Let me know when you thought of this week’s shows. Feedback is welcomed too! Thanks for reading and I’ll see you all in a few days for my reviews of NXT Takeover: New Orleans and WrestleMania!

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